White collar worker meditating in officeWe all know that resiliency is important to our professional goals, but did you know that it plays a significant role in your emotional and physical well-being outside of the office? It determines how well you cope with stress, whether you are able to recover from an illness, and your level of life satisfaction overall. That is why the World Health Organization (WHO) has made strengthening resiliency of individuals and communities a priority in its Health 2020 Campaign. (World Health Organization: Building resilience: a key pillar of Health 2020 and the Sustainable Development Goals.) According to the WHO, the two most important components to building resiliency are self-care and the cultivation of a support system. Id.

As the legal industry has begun to shift its attention to wellness, both mental and physical, female lawyers would do well to pay attention. Medical experts advise that the vast majority of illnesses are linked to stress. This includes high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease, autoimmune diseases, and mental illness. Unfortunately, these stress-related diseases affect women in greater numbers than men. Women are more likely to experience autoimmune diseases, and they are diagnosed with depression and anxiety in greater numbers than men. According to current statistics from the National Institute of Mental Health, women are twice as likely to suffer from anxiety disorders and 2.5 times as likely to develop depression. Heart disease is responsible for one in every four female deaths; yet it still is seen as a primarily male risk despite the fact that it impacts both sexes equally—and despite the fact that women are more likely to die after suffering a heart attack than men.

All of these illnesses are literally issues of life and death that need to be addressed. What can be done about it? We need to build resilience.

Often we start a new year resolving to take better care of ourselves. We vow to start exercising regularly, to plan meals and eat more green things, to get more sleep, and to do more of the things we love. By February, we are back to life's busy-ness, and these resolutions first fall to the bottom of our to-do-list, and, eventually, get moved to our "wish list" instead. We would never dream of leaving something undone on our work or home to-do-list because people are counting on us, but we think nothing of sacrificing our own wellness needs.

There are a myriad of reasons for this. We face urgent deadlines, billing pressures, business development obligations, client demands, politics at the office, and all of the tasks that go into caring for families and maintaining our homes. As if there was not enough on our plates, we take on professional, civic, and office leadership roles. As the old saying goes, if you want something done, ask a busy person. We over-extend ourselves to the point that we don't have another moment to spare, and when things get busy, the easiest person to disappoint is ourselves.

We know we need to take better care of ourselves, but somehow we don't make it a priority. As just one example, most women recognize a good night's sleep as extremely important to their well-being, but most rarely get the recommended amount. Similarly, while women recognize the need to regularly connect with friends and family, they report that they don't spend enough time with those who are most important to them.

So, how can we prioritize self-care and a strong social network? Recognize that resiliency evolves over time through experience and intention. It is a muscle you develop and strengthen by insisting upon an unfailing commitment to self-care and by building a support system. These simple steps can help.

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SELF-CARE

  • Change Your Mindset. Taking care of yourself is not selfish; it's an absolute necessity. Taking time to rejuvenate is one of the best investments you can make. You are a better lawyer, wife, mother, friend, etc. when you take time for you. A life of stress and anxiety takes its toll on your health, wellness, and overall happiness. Plan for longevity. You need your strength to get through life. Make that doctor's appointment you've been putting off. Preventive healthcare is one of the best things you can do for yourself. Even if you don't experience illness, being burned out leaves you nothing to give others. Refill your tank so that you can help others refill theirs.
  • Schedule Time for Yourself. Make an appointment with you. You put everything else on your calendar, so the surest way to remember to take care of yourself is to actually schedule the time to do it. Good stress management begins with a healthy, well-rested body and soul, so give yourself a break, even if it's just 10 minutes a day to start. There are 1,440 minutes in a day—if you cannot spare 10 of those for yourself, it's time to make some changes in your life.
  • Choose Your Priorities Wisely. Take some time to consider why you are not making self-care a priority. It is likely that the primary reason is "not enough time in the day." If you are overbooked with too many things to do, give serious thought to what you can change or stop doing. Maybe you can withdraw from that committee that you said "yes" to when you should have said "no." Maybe you can lower your housekeeping standards or get some help. Enlist the help of a friend or spouse to help you identify those things that can be reduced or eliminated. Spend some time thinking about your priorities and what stands in the way of living the life you want. Identify what makes you happy and what makes you feel renewed, and focus on doing more of that.
  • Think and Speak Positively. One of the most important aspects of self-care is positivity, both in our thinking and our speaking. Stop listening to the negative voice in your head. Tell yourself that the sun will come out tomorrow. Be hopeful for a better tomorrow by recognizing that most of the problems we are facing today are merely temporary. Believing you can overcome an obstacle or recover from an illness is the first step toward making it happen.
  • Follow the Advice That You Give to Your Friends. When friends say they feel anxious and stressed, you advise them to take some time for themselves. You tell them not to be so hard on themselves. You tell them to do more of what they love. Be a friend to yourself.
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CULTIVATE Your Support System

  • Stay Connected. Stay connected to family and friends. Loneliness and isolation can play a significant role in mental illnesses. If you don't live near family or close friends, use technology to stay in touch, but don't underestimate the value of in-person interactions. We are social creatures. We need regular social contact for a healthy psyche. Intentionally cultivate relationships with others. Behind every successful and happy female lawyer stands a community of people that provide social connections, encouragement, and strength.
  • Find Your People. Join a community. Seek out opportunities to become involved in a group that shares an interest in something you care about or engages in a hobby that interests you. Resolve to spend more time with people who energize and encourage you. And it's even better if they make you laugh. Laughter is a great stress reliever. Join an affinity group in the legal profession. Studies have shown that women's legal groups provide meaningful support for female lawyers, resulting in greater satisfaction with their practices.
  • Reach Out and Touch Someone. Be proactive in creating opportunities for social interaction. Whether in your office or in your personal life, take steps to create opportunities to connect with others. Be the organizer of group events. Invite people for coffee, dinner, or some other activity that you enjoy. Meet and get to know your neighbors.
  • Give Back. Find a cause that interests you, and get involved to support it. Many charities need your skill set. You can make an impact on an issue that means something to you and maybe even make some new friends along the way. It can be as simple and informal as doing something kind for someone you know or volunteering for a personal cause. Giving back can be a powerful way to pull yourself out of a valley, get out of your own head, and build your resilience.
  • Have a Sense of Purpose. Studies have shown that those who believe in something greater than themselves display greater resilience. It has been said that those who know their "why" find a way to endure any "how." Do some soul-searching to find your purpose. Whether you believe in a higher power, have a spiritual practice, or embrace values that are meaningful to you, it provides you with a compass that guides you in identifying your goals and moving toward them.

Building resiliency is critical for women in the legal profession. It increases our ability to handle experiences that could be overwhelming and helps us to maintain our perspective and balance when challenges arise. If we want to succeed in life—as well as our chosen profession—we must prioritize self-care and the cultivation of a support system. Our health and wellness depend on it.

Sandra Wunderlich is a partner in the St. Louis office of Tucker Ellis. She has a diverse litigation background, with a particular emphasis on intellectual property consulting and litigation. An experienced trial lawyer, Sandy has been lead trial counsel in a dozen jury and bench trials. Over the past 25 years, she has litigated intellectual property matters, products liability cases for large pharmaceutical manufacturers, agricultural and industrial manufacturers, and handled other complex litigation throughout the country.