It's a familiar conceit: dozens of nobodies queuing for what seems like forever to debase themselves before a panel of whimsically arbitrary judges in the faint hope of fortune and glory.

But the partnership grind is arguably not as cruel as the trial-by-fire endured by contestants on atonal shame-fest The X Factor, where contestants have to do all of the above in the presence of Sharon Osborne.

The link between the two (yup, that tired gag is actually going somewhere) is national titan Beachcroft, which apparently blazed something of a trail for the inexplicably popular TV show. Indeed, Beachcroft partners last year used their annual retreat to break in the facilities at swanky rural retreat Heythrop Park – where X Factor contestants subsequently gathered in their hundreds to audition for the latest series.

Whether there were quite so many 'We Love Simon' t-shirts in 'honour' of Beachcroft top man Hodson as there were for namesake Cowell is uncertain.