An A&O Partner's Pride Story – 'Coming Out Allowed Me To Bring So Much More To Life'
The Magic Circle partner speaks out about coming out and dealing with questions about a wife and kids.
June 26, 2019 at 06:50 AM
3 minute read
As part of Pride Month, Law.com's Legal Week spoke to Allen & Overy partner William Samengo-Turner about his experience as an openly gay man in the legal industry. Here, he explains how important senior role models aided his journey to coming out at work, and why junior lawyers shouldn't feel pressurised to if it doesn't feel right.
I came out relatively late. Everyone has their own journey and their own story. I would tell junior lawyers: only come out when you are ready, it's not a race. It's a wonderful thing when you do, but you need to feel comfortable and safe in an environment that you are happy with both at work and at home. Coming out allowed me to bring so much more to life inside and outside of the office.
Having senior people in the business who are visibly gay and successful, like Jim Ford and David Stone at A&O, removed a lot of doubt around wanting to come out and feeling comfortable, safe and celebrated in doing so.
I wasn't particularly nervous in coming out at work because I knew everyone so well, but even so I was surprised at the outpouring of love and support. It was a good reminder of the quality of the people I work with, and I can see the importance of creating an atmosphere and environment that is open and accepting.
I have never been the victim of any sort of discrimination or abuse at work, and I never felt held back or excluded because of my sexuality either. I like to think that if I ever felt that way I'd have called it out.
However, there are situations in which LGBT people need to make a decision as to whether they correct heteronormative assumptions. There are moments when talking to clients or colleagues where they might ask about your wife and kids, where you can easily become awkward. Someone who's straight doesn't necessarily have to consider situations like that on a daily basis.
I recognise that being a white gay man, my experience is very likely to have been easier than that of many other members of the LGBTQ community and I think it is important that people in my position are focussed on being agents for change.
I think there has been a change in the way that law firms approach that topic, and that they have come a huge way. I don't think we used to have conversations around LGBT inclusion and diversity as we do now. During the past five years, the focus has shifted from making people feel comfortable and accepted – that should be a given – to pushing harder and making them feel they can excel and be celebrated for who they are.
If the business doesn't create an environment where people feel comfortable to come out, be themselves and bring their best self to work every day, then it's missing out on the pool of talent from which it could recruit. I think visibility is a key thing. The old-school 'pale, male and stale' idea of law firms is something that we've had to challenge.
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