One of these things is not like the others: Boies Schiller Flexner. Arnold & Porter. Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher. Winston & Strawn. Michael D. Cohen & Associates.

But they've all counted Elliott Broidy as a client.

When the Republican fundraiser/ defense contractor faced legal issues in the past, court records show that he tapped elite lawyers across the board. Among them: Boies Schiller partner Lee Wolosky, who was President Obama's Special Envoy for Guantanamo; Winston & Strawn partners Ian Eisner and John Schreiber; Gibson Dunn's Douglas Fuchs; Peter Root at Arnold & Porter; and Christopher Clark, now a partner at Latham & Watkins who was previously with Dewey & LeBoeuf.

Impressive, right?

Jenna GreeneSo why would Broidy hire Michael Cohen (JD Thomas M. Cooley Law School, class of 1991) to pay Shera Bechard, Playboy's Miss November 2010, $1.6 million to keep their supposed affair and her resulting pregnancy quiet?

Admittedly, it makes more sense than new revelations that drug giant Novartis paid Cohen $1.2 million through his shell company Essential Consultants for advice on “healthcare policy matters.”

Or that AT&T admitted paying Essential Consultants at least $200,000 for “insights into understanding the new administration.”

Or that New York investment firm Columbus Nova, which is linked to Russian billionaire Viktor Vekselberg, paid Cohen $500,000 as a consultant “regarding potential sources of capital and potential investments in real estate and other ventures.”

Or perhaps most implausibly of all, Korea Aerospace Industries says it paid Cohen $150,000 for “legal consulting concerning accounting standards.”

At least paying off Playboy playmates is in Cohen's wheelhouse.

Still, why would Broidy pick Cohen as his lawyer if the payoff had nothing, ahem, to do with Donald Trump?

It's not the only thing that doesn't add up, as Paul Campos writing for New York magazine points out.

The official story is that Bechard's lawyer, Keith Davidson (who also initially represented Stormy Daniels and Playboy model Karen McDougal in her deal with The National Enquirer) reached out to Cohen about Bechard's affair with Broidy.

Why would Davidson go to Cohen? That's a head-scratcher.

“Cohen was Trump's lawyer, not Broidy's,” Campos wrote. “Cohen didn't represent Broidy at that time and therefore had no duty of confidentiality or loyalty to Broidy (or Bechard for that matter). And the information that Broidy had an affair with Bechard was extremely sensitive, as Bechard was set to make seven figures for agreeing to keep that information private.”

Also, why would it be worth $1.6 million to Broidy to cover it up? His family might care, but why would anyone else? Moreover, if it was such a deep, dark secret, Campos notes, why did Broidy “admit to the affair the very first time a journalist asked him about it?”

Unless, Campos hypothesizes, it was actually Trump who had the affair with Bechard.

This is where the story turns purely speculative. Did Broidy cover for the president by taking responsibility and funding the seven-figure settlement?

Cohen had to take out a home equity loan to pay Stormy Daniels $130,000. It seems unlikely he could float $1.6 million for Bechard's silence. So in steps Broidy to write the hush money check, and in return, Broidy gets influence and access to Trump?

Fake news? Sure, maybe. There's no proof of anything, just a lot of questions that seem to point in the same direction.

Consider a New York Times story in March, before the Bechard payment was revealed, about Broidy's outsized influence.

“Mr. Broidy suggested to clients and prospective customers of his Virginia-based defense contracting company, Circinus, that he could broker meetings with Mr. Trump, his administration and congressional allies,” Kenneth P. Vogel and David D. Kirkpatrick reported, noting his “ability to leverage his political connections to boost his business.”

The Times story continues, “[T]he administration made no effort to curtail his offers of access to clients or prospective clients. Yet Mr. Broidy was so aggressive, some associates said, that they warned him to tone down his approach.”

I guess he was really confident of staying in the president's good graces?

Oh, and Campos also notes that Broidy pleaded guilty in 2009 to bribing New York State Comptroller Alan Hevesi—and that one bribe actually involved paying off the girlfriend of one of the officials he was bribing.

“There are two undeniable facts: Trump has a habit of having sex with women exactly like Bechard, and then paying them off to stay silent, and Broidy is a man who pays large sums of money, legally and illegally, to influence powerful politicians,” Campos wrote.

As far as theories go, I've heard crazier.

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Lateral Watch

Katten Muchin Rosenman is bulking up its new Dallas office, adding Jorge Solis, the former U.S. District chief judge for the Northern District of Texas who retired two years ago, as special counsel.

The firm also added white-collar and fraud litigation partners Barrett Howell and Brandon McCarthy from Bracewell.

McDermott Will & Emery partner Stephen Ryan said the lawyer for Stormy Daniels should be denied the ability to appear in the Southern District because of material he made public Tuesday showing payments to Michael Cohen's shell company.

“If the plaintiff wanted to have someone who is adequate and typical I would have expected that person to surface long before today,” Orrick's Lynne Hermle told San Francisco Superior Court Judge Mary Wiss.

Favorite detail: The friend he tipped swallowed the Post-its or napkins on which he wrote the incriminating information. And yet … they still got caught. Jeez.

SG Noel Francisco in an amicus brief says the U.S. Supreme Court should reverse a federal appellate court decision that would allow an antitrust class action to go forward against Apple.

Former federal prosecutor Mary Beth Buchanan and her most recent law firm, Bryan Cave Leighton Paisner, face allegations that they covered up a whistleblower client's use of “FBI surveillance software.”

He's retained Isabelle Kirshner, a prominent New York defense attorney whose law firm, Clayman & Rosenberg, has often represented lawyers in criminal cases.

The deputy AG said companies are deprived of the benefits of certainty and finality when faced with a multi-agency “pile-on” investigation. (Cue defense lawyer cheers.)

A pretty good trick, considering the policy excluded trade secrets claims.