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Before Torruella, Stahl, and Thompson, Circuit Judges.

Plaintiffs Luis Costas Elena and Hazel Russell McMillan appeal the district court’s dismissal of their complaint alleging a host of constitutional violations instigated by neighboring landowners Henry Paredes and Carmen Despradel and carried out by the Municipality of San Juan, Puerto Rico.*fn1 Specifically, the plaintiffs say, Paredes and Despradel lured the city into killing a botanical menagerie, including lush trees and rare orchids, that the plaintiffs had maintained on their property in San Juan. In the end, however, not a single federal claim has been pled adequately, so we affirm the dismissal of the plaintiffs’ entire case.

Plaintiffs Costas and Russell had a longstanding feud with neighboring landowners Paredes and Despradel. The problem was rooted in now-deceased vegetation that the plaintiffs describe as “palm trees, bushes and a large, healthy tree that . . . served as a sanctuary for wild parrots . . . as well as heliconia and ginger” but that Paredes and Despradel describe as having been so “wild, uncultivated, and sparse[]” as to have caused them “ miser[y] . . . and intense suffering.”*fn2 According to the plaintiffs, the “large, healthy tree” (which was also “magnificent and majestic”) served as a marker tree that spanned and defined the boundary between the plaintiffs’ and their neighbors’ respective properties.

 
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