Q. I am working for a major screamer. This guy is ruining my life. I never know whether he’s going to be in a good mood or a bad mood. When he’s in a good mood, things are great — he praises everything, couldn’t be nicer — but when he’s steamed, it’s terrifying. He is very cutting, sarcastic, and demeaning. He’s a major player in the firm, tons of revenue and big clients, so everyone kowtows to him, but people (especially me!) really can’t stand him. I have to say I’ve learned a lot while working with him. Am I being a masochist? Should I get out of here?
A. There may be one or two workplaces in the world without a person like the one you are describing, but I haven’t found them yet. The behavior pattern you’re talking about is a classic abuser’s profile: volatile and crazy behavior followed by sweetness and light, alternating blame and praise. This raises fundamental questions about the quality of workplace life vs. profits above all.
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