When Supreme Court Justice Bernadette Clark is in her car, residents will notice the judicial plates and say, “Hi judge.” The only problem is they're talking to her husband.

“From my perspective up here, it's the resistance to even thinking you can run for judge,” the Oneida County jurist said. “They would talk about my hair, my clothes, my makeup, the length of my skirt. I tried to change the conversation. Let's talk about my qualifications.”

Being a female judge in upstate New York is still a rarity. There are 25 mostly rural upstate counties with no female judges in the state's employ and 10 with just one each. That compares to the New York City metropolitan area where nearly 400 of the state's 507 female judges are concentrated, according to state statistics.

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By those standards, Oneida County, with three female judges on the state payroll, is considered progressive. Still, Clark said, she is often treated with disrespect.

“I have one lawyer still to this day who still calls me 'ma'am' although I have asked him to address me as 'judge' or 'your honor,'” she said. “The lawyers in court would say things and act certain ways in my courtroom that they would never think to pull in some of the other judges' courtrooms.”

The same stories were repeated again and again by New York's upstate female judges.

Lawyers agree to appear in front of a female judge but when a male judge later schedules a matter at the same time, they seek an adjournment from her rather than him. They arrive late in a female judge's courtroom or leave early to attend to a proceeding in a male judge's courtroom. They address a female judge in a tone that they'd never use with the male judge down the hall.

“I do often feel that I get the short end of the stick in terms of getting attorneys if they're double-booked and I do feel attorneys very often will double-book more because they feel they can get away with it,” said Family Court Judge Julia Brouillette, who is also in Oneida County.

But, she acknowledges, the discrimination has become less egregious with the passage of time. She points to an experience she had as a young attorney in Texas when appearing in a pants suit in front of an older male judge.

He had her approach the bench. “I'm a judge because I want to see a little leg,” he confided. “And I said 'duly noted.'” The next time she appeared before that judge, she recalls with just a little bit of embarrassment that she wore her shortest skirt, a low-cut blouse and a push-up bra. And, lo and behold, the judge sided with her on all her objections that day.

Syracuse City Court Judge Kate Rosenthal remembers that when she first started as a lawyer the male bar association was having an event and wanted to know whether the female bar association would prepare the food.

Such thinking might be a relic of the past but stereotypes still exist. Sometimes, though, Rosenthal is able to see the humor in the stories she tells.

“The defendant kept calling me 'miss' instead of 'your honor' or 'judge,' which is better than some of the names we get called,” she recalls. “His lawyer leaned over and said, 'It's judge.' And so he said, 'Miss Judge.'”

But she notes that the treatment of female judges and attorneys has improved since her early days.

“I had one Supreme Court judge say, 'Any time I see you it's nothing but trouble. Why don't you stay home in the kitchen?' And I said, 'Judge, have you ever seen me in your kitchen? Believe me, you don't want to see me in your kitchen.'”

Oswego County Family Court Judge Allison Nelson, who is the only female judge on that court, was assigned to represent a client as a young lawyer. “I was the only person there with a suit and briefcase,” she says. “But this judge in front of my client asked me for identification.”

Onondaga Supreme Court Justice Deborah Karalunas said being a female judge can make her feel isolated because she's left out of golf outings and other social events. Lawyers take liberties with her too, she complains.

“I feel that lawyers are sometimes attempting to flirt. Don't tell me 'my hair looks nice today.' Is it horrific? No. It just tells me that we are treated differently,” she says.

But, upon reflection, she doesn't want anyone to feel sorry for her.

“I have met so many, many wonderful lawyers and judges throughout the state, and forged so many, many cherished friendships,” she writes. “And I know that the discrimination I've sustained pales in comparison to that endured by many others in and out of this profession. So I leave you with this: I am truly blessed.”