Julie Q. Brush, Solutus founding partner. Julie Q. Brush, Solutus founding partner. Q: I'm in an email war with a co-worker and it's getting out of control. How do I deal with this situation?

  1. No More Emails! The email route has proved ineffective for your interaction with your colleague. So discontinue the conversation in this medium immediately.
  2. Cool Down. No one can think clearly when she or he is angry. So take time to cool down and create some distance. Go for a walk, get coffee, work on a project, get a good night's sleep.
  3. Analyze the Situation. Now that you have a clear head, assess the following: how you feel … and why, your colleague's state of mind by his/her words, where there is friction and potential misunderstanding.
  4. Shift Your Mindset to Understanding and Problem-Solving. Digging in on a position won't solve any problems. This is your colleague. And good professionals work together to address conflict and create solutions. Think about what you can do to make that happen. Then do it.
  5. Pick. Up. The. Phone. A live conversation at this point is a must. Call your colleague and ask for a time to get together to discuss the issue further. If you can't meet face-to-face, schedule a call. What to say in your overture? Here are two examples:

Julie Q. Brush is the founder and author of The Lawyer Whisperer (www.thelawyerwhisperer.com), a career advice column for legal professionals, also found on LinkedIn. She is co-founder of Solutus Legal Search, a legal search/consulting boutique firm, serving as a strategic adviser to lawyers, law firms and corporations.