All litigators face aggressive behavior from bullying opponents, witnesses, and sometimes even their own clients. At times, judges can be bullies too. Indeed, several courts have openly acknowledged the problem of incivility in the legal profession. In 1992, the Seventh Circuit’s Committee on Civility observed that “the decline of civility standards in litigation practice is among the most important and universally discussed issues facing the legal community today.” See Final Report of the Committee on Civility of the Seventh Federal Judicial Circuit, 143 F.R.D. 441, 444 (1992). Despite sincere efforts to “restore” civility, the problem remains. In California, for example, the Court of Appeal for the Fourth District fairly recently lamented that the legal profession is “rife with cynicism” and “awash in incivility.” Kim v. Westmoore Partners, 201 Cal. App. 4th 267, 293 (2011).

Confronted with this reality, many attorneys are simply told, “Get a thicker skin,” and “Don’t let it bother you.” While well-intentioned, such facile advice can have adverse consequences. In particular, it can lead many attorneys to simply mask their feelings while anger and frustration boil up inside, resulting in stress, unhappiness, and self-destructive behavior. Attorneys desperately need strategies to manage difficult people and situations that are both healthy and in furtherance of their client’s interests.

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